Waking Up

As I have practiced sustained Lectio this month, I find certain awarenesses increasing. One such awareness is that much of the time I am preoccupied with what I call "dithering," which means spinning my wheels without enough traction. I am pulled in several different directions, indicated by the stack of books next to me in the sunroom. Moloney is at the top of a stack of books on narratives and possible selves. On the floor is a book on Help for the Helpers, resting atop Moral Ground: Ethical Action for a Planet in Peril, above Sacred Space: the prayer book for 2011 - a book of daily readings and prayer. In another pile is the book, You Can Go Home Again, by Monica McGoldrick.

Yet, as I write this post, I find that, strangely, there is some coherence in these piles of books, and also a sense of connection to my practice of Lectio on the three chapters (15, 16, and 17) in the Gospel of John. That is, a dawning real-ization that there is an inescapable connection of each to all - within helping relationships; within the biosphere itself; within those called out to be a Light, dwelling and indwelt by the Holy; and within families - all the generations. Weaving all these threads together in a coherent life lived one day at a time, is both a challenge, and a joy.

The challenges are many. It is no longer possible to simply accept the "knowledge" passed on to me as I grew from childhood to legal adulthood. Much of what we knew when I was a kid has been shown to be demonstrably incorrect. Much of what we know now is quite fuzzy and we learn more all the time about the world of space, time, and form. For example, we know now that animals do feel and think. When I was first in biology classes in the 60's, we were cautioned about "anthropomorphizing" animals. Psychology classes taught that mental operations were not relevant, that you could not know what was in the mind of another person, so bothering with that was inefficient and not professional. Now we know about mirror neurons, and the electro-magnetic field of heartbeats, and how the mother's breathing affects the ability of her infant to regulate his/her own breathing. Amazing stuff! I am challenged to learn more through reading, listening, and becoming aware of my own feelings and intuitions.

Where some of the fuzziness comes in for me, and most of us, is in the persistent set of beliefs that somehow we "individuals" are separate, set off from the events all around the earth (and, mayhap, in "the heavens"). In a time when species are going extinct, when planetary water sources are drying up, being depleted, or gushing forth from disappearing glaciers, when rising sea levels threaten millions of people, when crops fail because of extreme weather events and people experience famine, how can we not feel this in our bones? There are now almost 6.9 billion people riding this beautiful spaceship. Well over 1 billion of them are in dire poverty, while almost half are living on less than the equivalent of $2.00 a day (figures are from http://povertyblog.wordpress.com/poverty_facts_and_statistics/). Yet we in the "developed" nations move through our days figuring out new ways to profit from that which creates the misery of people, eco-systems, and the planet.  Or we may simply try to deny that these tragedies have anything to do with us or our actions, our way of living.

Interlocking systems of global carbon emissions, global warming, global capitalism, and global governance are creating what is now a new eaarth, as Bill McKibben names it. Global climate change has already changed irrevocably what we once knew as earth.  We are left in an unpredictable world, one unlike that in which we lived through all the years of our evolving. How we humans respond to the new conditions on eaarth is immensely important. Will we in the developed world allow even more people to starve to death or perish in "natural" disasters each year due to climate changes? Will we continue to deny that global warming causes climate changes resulting extreme weather, crop failures? Will we curb our appetites for more...? Will we regulate our individual and community lives so that others, humans and other beings, may live? Will we reduce our carbon emissions, commit to ending unrestrained global financial speculation and corporate wrongdoing that that harm people and the earth? Will we care for each other and the eaarth we have now co-created in (unfortunately) our own image?

We will do what is necessary only if we can absorb the Light, experience the joy, revel in the intelligences and consciousness of "all our relatives" and the Creator.  Many have said that the doorway is through gratitude, and that ingratitude is a great sin. May I - we - take time to be mindful of who and where we are, and allow gratitude to surface. May I - we - express gratitude in every way that is possible to me - us. May we abide (dwell) in the One, and become one with the multitude of beings, of which we are one.

In the New Year

This morning I'm sitting in our sunroom, setting intentions for the new year. One of those intentions is to step up my practice of sustained lectio and be more consistent in that practice. I want for my everyday living and experience to reflect the ongoing incorporation of the Word, the revelatory text, in and through my life. In the month of January, I will listen to the recordings of the School of Lectio to refresh my memory and to be further inspired by the words and voice of S. Meg Funk.

I am making a commitment to myself to read daily in Moloney's commentary on the Gospel of John and in that of Aquinas as well. I will keep working on memorizing sections of the chapters I've selected in the Gospel of John, perhaps a short section each month. As I work along, I will also be reflecting on the symbolic dimensions of these chapters, and, where possible, expressing the symbols in some creative way. Finally, each day I will engage with the moral dimension of the chapters. Their theme is dwelling "in Christ" and being indwelt by Christ. It seems appropriate to "guard thoughts," as S. Meg suggests, to seek God's help to counter the thoughts that lead away from God, and to open to and fill my mind with God-thoughts. As I am able, I will practice "ceaseless prayer" using the Jesus Prayer and the practice of the Presence of God.

In addition, following the suggestion of one of the blogs I read, I have chosen three words for this year. In order of their appearance to me, they are: radiate, mercy, charis. They will be in my mind as I do lectio and live each day. At this point, 'radiate' seems to me to be the solution to a concern that has shadowed my mood and thought over the last couple of months. The problems of this world seem so great, the general mood so grim, the suffering increasing. Every day I receive at least a dozen emails asking me to send money, sign onto a petition, call a congress person, or contact some corporate wrongdoer. In my postal mail there are more solicitations for worthy causes to end some form or another of suffering. I have felt overwhelmed by the misery represented in these communications. What to do? How to keep from being overwhelmed and going numb to it all? The answer embedded in the word 'radiate' is to absorb the Light and radiate it outward in my thoughts, words and actions - to do my best to let the Light shine forth into the darkness.

The word 'mercy' has been on my mind for some time now. At one point some years ago I took some kind of online quiz to "discover (my) spiritual gifts." It turned out that the only gift that really stood out was 'mercy.' Mercy seems to me to be the opposite of the harsh, punishing, unloving tenor of these times. We do not see mercy when people are killed because of road rage. We do not see mercy when children are deprived of love, affection and models of how to live. We do not see mercy when old and young are refused medical care because they have no money. We do not see mercy when sentences for crimes are applied on the basis of race and class. We do not see mercy when people applying for employment are discriminated against on the basis of age, appearance, race, disability, and/or gender.  Mercy understands, comforts, binds wounds and heals them if possible. Mercy builds up the other, finding the good and affirming it. Mercy refuses to condemn others; it leaves judgment to God. Mercy seeks to knit together families, communities, humanity itself and the whole web of living beings.

When I was enrolled in the Shalem Institute's program for individual spiritual direction, the first residency was a magical time for me. It took place at the Seton Center in Emmitsburg, Maryland. The place itself was a lovely facility, built in a quadrangle around an inner garden. The atmosphere was sweet and holy. My small group for peer spiritual direction was filled with graced people. A word that emerged from within this group was this word, 'charis.'

Here is some discussion of what charis means. First and foremost, charis means grace. Within Christian theology much discussion, and ironically, not a few wars, have been prompted by trying to specify and determine what grace is. The quote below from www.bible-researcher.com addresses some elements of a definition of grace. The Catholic Encyclopedia has several pages on the various kinds of grace, how they are related, how they are communicated to and by human beings.

In most of the passages, however, in which the word charis is used in the New Testament, it signifies the unmerited operation of God in the heart of man, affected through the agency of the Holy Spirit. While we sometimes speak of grace as an inherent quality, it is in reality the active communication of divine blessings by the inworking of the Holy Spirit, out of the fulness of Him who is "full of grace and truth," Rom. 3:24; 5:2, 15; 17:20; 6:1; I Cor. 1:4; II Cor. 6:1; 8:9; Eph. 1:7; 2:5, 8; 3:7; I Pet. 3:7; 5:12. 
Louis Berkhof, Systematic Theology (Grand Rapids, 1949), pp. 426-27

As I reflect on charis, I realize that for me, grace has the qualities of freedom, power, harmony, graceful and easy movement, loveliness, giftedness and gratitude. Several writers have addressed grace as the free 'gratuitous' gift of God to humans and angels. It seems to me that not only does God freely give, but also, the gift of grace itself is a gift of freedom to humans. We are free because we are graced with life, with our own gifts of body, mind and spirit. Further, we are graced with the companionship of God, who entered our own human life so as to share it most intimately with us. We are graced freely by the very Presence of God in our own souls.

Grace also has the aspect of power. The image that comes to mind is of a beautiful animal, perhaps a Lipizzaner stallion, bursting with focused energy, able to dance upon and above the ground. Charis is a dancer, disciplined, strong, and utterly beautiful. Grace accomplishes its ends because it has within it the giftedness of its being and it flows within and is sustained within Being of the dynamic God.

Another quality of grace is harmony. It brings harmony to human persons, to groups of people and to all of nature. Grace creates cosmic harmony, making a symphonic unity of a diversity of creatures. When charis is present, conflict is held within a wider harmony. Graceful and easy movement characterizes the harmony, the unity within diversity. Charis smooths harsh and jagged motions, allowing flexibility, stretching and strengthening, like the beautiful movements of a flowing yogi/yogini, or a dancer who seems to float in the air, or a free and happy child swinging or playing in the water.

Charis is loveliness itself. It embodies beauty and goodness. It conveys to its observers and recipients its own nature, which is sweet, gives pleasure, and is filled with joy. Charis is a gift, that gives itself, and that gifts the recipient with its own ability to gift others. Thus, it is truly the Gift that keeps on giving. Finally, charis is gratitude, gratitude for the gift of itself, gratitude for being able to gift others and gratitude for Being.